Thursday, December 30, 2004

yipee!!!

hmm...the past two days spelled fun for me as i have spent my time with friends i have not seen for a long time. two days--or should i say nights ago, sandra and i went to jr's place (yes..to that house) to grace his birthday celebration...it was fun though only three girls were present (hi dazz..nice to meet you!;p)-- wait, should i say four? cz martin was there..no, three girls..for these was one of martin's ''im a guy'' nights;p heheeh~ ::peace:: most of the time though, martin and i were desperatly trying to get in touch with a certain person called reia, but to no avail..oh well..we just took pictures of ourselves to keep ourselves amused..and not to mention play with the food on the buffet table! hahahahahah;p oops!
last night, on the other hand was also such fun! ahahahaha...cla and i got together in the afternoon plng and went for a two hour drive to alabang twn cnter..yes~loads and loads of stories over hw we hve been poured out continously as we, the unfortunate ones got stuck in traffic on our way there...we were rewarded however, as we were treated to cpk with a slice of pizza each and a glass of rasp iced tea (<--the best!) by her mum;p yaay...but cla and i went to the neighboring friday's shortly after and woah..chicken chicken CHICKEN!!! (and did i mention their strawberry iced tea's the best also?) hahahaha;p well after, i stressed myself with sme shopping..got lotsa stuff so we got to wlk around..(good cz i really had to wlk aLOT of food dwn!;0)

oohh..and did i mention...i was able to shw her smthng too! haha funny..


*belated happy brthday, andoy...jr!;p



ay..oonga..chk this out *click*



teltelbasked under the sun on 10:57 AM

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Friday, December 24, 2004

signed, santa's little helper

it's been usually hard for me to get into the feel of Christmas despite the settling in of the 'ber' and the noticable decreased readings of mr. celsius, fahrenheit and kelvin. maybe because i don't really look forward into it...the unplanned affair would usually turn out the way it was a year ago, which turned out the way it was two years ago, and so on...with slight changes dictated by the presence or absence of family, friends, and some other people. please don't get me wrong...i enjoy Christmas as much as any other kid swimming in presents...the thing is that, i seem to look forward more into the tasteful feast in mummylo's house...aka, noche buena, the family's style-- than anything else ;p

i have been overworked and have been stressed up for quite sometime now. stressed and overworked for all the wrong reasons. stressed and overworked because i have been too good [or have i? hmm..] you get the point, you're smart enough to read. but as some piece of wisdom goes..''those who give with all their hearts will be rewarded, someday...some place'' [the wordings are not precisely accurate, as you can see but hey, you get the essence, right?];p

i have not been looking forward into the rewards the old wisdom was referring to as well..nah-uh...im NOT that good! but it's funny..due to some twisted reasons [maybe santa's wishing mill has been overworked, too], this stressed, distressed and overworked little elf [that's me!;p] has been able to feel Christmas, and a week too soon! i have gotten into the Christmas feel and im happy;p

so...after satisfying my hand's urge to some wrapping paper and scotch tape..i have given myself some time-- time to just think of things. indeed, i have awfully been rewarded...[and to think the only thing i wrote santa was about a new handset *winks*] my mum has come back, lotsa family flew in from everywhere, i was able to get in touch with my bestie and my closest friends, i have found true friends in my girls, i have become closer and more open to my family and alas-- i have found my nerdie *hugs*

wow...an early Christmas for me! hahaha..and all i have been busy with was thanking the Man above and cuddling into santa in great appreciation as well! wow...this elf could never be happier! aah...at last i have been looking forward to something than just noche buena..thanks y'all and happy holidays!

signed,
santa's little helper ;p


teltelbasked under the sun on 11:17 AM

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Wednesday, December 22, 2004

whew

i cant think of anything to write right now.. NO.i n fact, i know losta things to write about only that i cant think of anything-- of how i can possibly write things down. forgive me...im currently overloaded with things(..to be continued..)


teltelbasked under the sun on 9:51 PM

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Saturday, December 11, 2004

when all's been said and done

all these things have put me down rock bottom the past week. i felt self pity, as futile as it it may seem, but yes, i did. all these 'suffer the consequences' thing resulted into a desperate effort of *some people trying to justify their faults by means of destroying my name...tsktsk. looks as if i should be the one who pity them, huh? now, going back to self pity, let me just say that taking in everything is not easy. not easy even for me. lucky me i had people who stood by me althroughout...

feeling really bad for myself has demnded alot of understanding from some people out there. one particular person has been understanding enough that this person would take in alot of things from me, up to the point that this person would not budge as i unconsciously channel all my anger to him. i have been mean to this person the past days, why? because this person has been reaching out, trying to take in everything so as to satisfy my need for a tension *slash* anger *slash* disappointemnt outlet.

some friend huh? and i took this person for granted! much as this person wants to project the image that he is strong and could take in everything so as to satisfy a friend, as much as he numbs himself and says he's ok or he's not mad and everything is alright, i know this person has reached the point beyond his limitation. he's hurt, and it's all my fault.

so stupid of me to let others be affected about things they should not be affected by in the first place. so stupid of me to think that it is not okay to show your weaknesses. so stupid of me to take people for granted. stupid of me to feel self pity. stupid of me to not listen. but not so stupid of me to learn and accept my faults.

i apologize.


teltelbasked under the sun on 2:31 PM

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Friday, December 10, 2004

vindicated

keeping things inside takes all the strength one could ever muster. to keep things inside for a very long time does more bad than good-- as i have finally realized. sure, you think it is good to keep something away from the open until it knocks on your conscience begging for you to let it out--until it starts to destroy you...then you'll start to ask yourself (after some grueling hours of prying things out of yourself)..why can't i keep my stupid mouth shut? yes...guilt.

but to feel guilty for some things you are not supposed to feel guilty about is just wrong. i know i did the right thing-- that i have finally realized. and with it, the acceptance of the consequences that comes with it (with telling the truth). i never did this to destroy relationships or whatever..i did this for myself, because no one tells me what i should do or not. i did this to win myself back. i did this because i know it is the right thing to do. screw them who says otherwise!

*now, breathing has never felt this good...


teltelbasked under the sun on 2:05 PM

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Monday, December 06, 2004

im tired of crying

yes..im tired of crying..i dont want to cry anymore over *those things...yeah, yeah..that little drama princess side of me which i have given up long ago to my little sister has sneeked its way back to me again..oh well...crying over a slice of chocolate cake with my girls ina, missy and cla has never been such fun (yeah, fun...);p i have found out things about my so-called friends and have really found which of them are true...wow..talk about highschool all over again! whaa...

i once--no, i repeatedly told myself that i'll never let myself to be too good enough to be used by other people...it took a whole sem and dmn good words from people to finally admit it to myself that i wasnt able to succeed in this...i tried to be bad, really..but i was too good, apparently.

i was too good to let others use me..to let others stab me where it hurts the most. i never really minded these...i know wht's true, i know wht's not...but to suck on my dignity and pride then try to destroy it is really sick. shit...people do this for some reasons. man, don't put that insensitivity crap on me, you users! look at yourselves..sick, just plain old sick. they do it because of envy, they are envious because they don't get the respect they think they desrve from others which in fact they actually dont...and some people get it...poor creatures...but now i finally summed all the guts to say these things, i guess it is now time for me to strike back, and happily bestow upon them, karma. time for me to dry my tears, time for me to be happy with my life again...because this, i deserve.

i just hope all's over now..i know im happy, i know im safe...

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you guys didnt have to see me cry...*embarrassed*

on a lighter note...it was really funny of my phil soc teacher (whose description i have posed before;p) to sing the growee song "tatangkad din ako.." ...and... imagine a delivery truck paved with flashy colors of frenzy (trust) parked infront of your school...


teltelbasked under the sun on 9:51 PM

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Sunday, December 05, 2004

better late than never

haay...kuya's birthday thingy wasnt much fun for me, really...call me bad but it was just a sleepy sleazy fest for me...yeah..and the feeling wen on for the whole day, until...

...until we went to the late afternoon mass! haha..man, it took a snoring (and believe me when i say snoring) man inside the church to crack us us and eventually enjoy the 'moment' together..haha at least even for just once (er--twice this day, all of us were ok with each other;p)

but then again i was pissed at smethng he did..yeah..that brther of mine totally ruined my movie date with my dad and two little sibs! hah! national treasure sana at shang..oh ell.. on the bringhter side, i was able to see elena and kaye again..wha!;p talk about a late positive turnout of events (for the day)

*fine, fine, happy birthday, kuya! ::mwah!::

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wait..please answer me this question..how can someone whom you think is nice (and really is) turn out to be such a jerk all of a sudden? just wondering...



teltelbasked under the sun on 8:30 PM

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Saturday, December 04, 2004

oink to food!

what a nice day today was..aside from the fact that nspt has been reduced from twice to once a week and from 3 hrs- 2hrs, i made new friends plus...i went out with my girls!!!;p

yup..girlie day today..well..sort of..haha why? coz..

hm..first cd and i went to strbx fr our usual saturday routine of a starbx pig out session...hmm today i had vanilla cream and chicken pocket sndwch!! haha hmm..headed fr galleria with cla to meet up with ina and missy..where? hmm..pizza hut baby! half a pizza (stuffed crust bacon supreme) and an order of fries and a glass of iced tea and a bowl of mushroom soup later, ina went na with victor and (gee..introduced us to his bro and friend *winks*) haha..

so we went on, just the three of us this time, (minus ina) window shopping!!!! hahaha...thn surprisingly vince shws up (cbi na eh..girl cia eh..haha jke!)

tpos..bridget jones' diary..;p funny, kilig..wha!!!!!!!

tpos..a large banana split blizzard! yumm (fatfat krystle!)
bwahahaha..oh well..

*happy birthday, tita marian!


teltelbasked under the sun on 8:53 PM

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Thursday, December 02, 2004

suspended

yaay..rain day for me!!! hahaha well, no class today..mening no phil soc, no english, no lit--man, all tht reading fr nothing! wha!!!

well, today, strted out pretty slow..so wht did i do? hm..i wtched ella enchanted and mean girls with my sister (horaay for dvds!);p haha thn i sat my ass infrnt of the pc an strted wrkin..(i still am, actually-- with a bowl of popcorn on hand!;p)

haay..today's such a nice day...*eats popcorn*..i got to 'talk' to reia about things i wnted to tell her..whehe finally!!!:P although im still waiting for my dad's msg (which i think will nvr come)-- if he'll allow me to go out with janice, eunice, tommy, resh to ghills..(wha, imma miss this i think, masya toh, fr sure..i kinda miss these ppl na nga...;p) oh well..

i really wish here's no class tmrw...*sleeps*


teltelbasked under the sun on 3:47 PM

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Wednesday, December 01, 2004

down and stuck

yeah. im bored...

im down..so down from what took place last nyt...i mean, i dont even know why the hell im sooo down today. hm..*wonders* opposing my skirty-girly-sunny dsposition yesterday, evry minute of today (note: from the minute i woke up) seems slower..yes..slower and longer (thn my ensci class!) whaa...;c

i wont tell you wht's wrong..not tht i dnt knw wht it is..oh, believe me, i know very well wht's wrong it's just that..argh! (smewhere to write on secretly..i want it now!! um-- index cards?, reia, wht do you think?);p

so how was my day-- really?

slow and long..i tried to drown myself with spongebob and fairly oddparents..didnt wrk..im trying to amuse myself with my phil soc handouts and the iliad...still not wrkng..

know what? i only realized tht i miss my room so much...damn..excuse the non coherent entry..i need someone to talk to...i need help..profesional help.

*wow. december came with such a... argh.


teltelbasked under the sun on 5:27 PM

whahahahaha...ensci was a bit fun yesterday, following up my 'mood for math' yesterday, i found ensci more interesting than usual..hahaha get this, for an hour and a half, all we did was..NOTHING! except for chosing our groupmates fr the sem..haha we even gt to choose our name fr it..first it was all environmentally..planeteers..we decided it was not that fun so, with the addition of rafa into the group-- "rafael's angels" was born..hehe;p dr. ponce had to agree with it..it was nice nga eh..it even had her favorite angel in it..rafael the archangel (which we have devoted one period of ensci to talk about..) haha ;p

**leaving, leaving...shit ugys, dont leave me..stay...




teltelbasked under the sun on 11:05 AM

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